When I write an essay and post it as a blog, I am, of course, only doing it for myself. These essays often take several weeks to complete, after receiving the initial inspiration. Before, during and after writing one, I find myself bringing its central idea into application during the day, and by the way, “application” is the heart of Michael Brown’s 2010 New Year Letter: Sparkling Through Application. He makes it clear in his Letter what is very apparent to me, personally, and to the people around me and what is happening in the world, that this year is a very difficult year, but he assures us that towards the end of the year we will experience a great deal of light, much like moving through the night towards dawn.
Remember that as we move through the last moments of dawn toward the sunrise, there is great propensity for unconsciousness. It is important we remember this, realize the implications, and behave accordingly. Therefore, application, application, application.
(Michael Brown, p. 9)
From moment to moment, I am asking for help to come into alignment with my true Self, no matter what appears to be going on in my dream. I am trying to remember to practice presuming God. It is always a matter of remembering and forgetting, moment to moment.
As I expressed in my preceding post, I am determined to be aware of where my awareness is. That is, I am aware of being either the mechanism of decision, i.e., in transition from seeing through the body’s eyes (separation), allying with the ego, or seeing through the eyes of Christ, uniting with my true Self (healing).
Healing is the way in which the separation is overcome. Separation is overcome by union. It cannot be overcome by separating. The decision to unite must be unequivocal, or the mind itself is divided and not whole. Your mind is the means by which you determine your own condition, because mind is the mechanism of decision. It is the power by which you separate or join, and experience pain or joy accordingly. T-8.IV.5:3-8
This is why we are all powerful; we have the power to decide between Heaven or hell.
If I decide to see through my body’s eyes, I am walking around in time and space in fear, making my own hell.
Is it not evident that what the body's eyes perceive fills you with fear? Perhaps you think you find a hope of satisfaction there. Perhaps you fancy to attain some peace and satisfaction in the world as you perceive it. Yet it must be evident the outcome does not change. Despite your hopes and fancies, always does despair result. And there is no exception, nor will there ever be. The only value that the past can hold is that you learn it gave you no rewards which you would want to keep. For only thus will you be willing to relinquish it, and have it gone forever. T-25.II.1
If I decide to see through the eyes of Christ, my true Identity, I am experiencing timelessness and love, having forgiven what I saw through the body’s eyes.
My Self is holy beyond all the thoughts
of holiness of which I now conceive.
Its shimmering and perfect purity
is far more brilliant than is any light
that I have ever looked upon. Its love
is limitless, with an intensity
that holds all things within it, in the calm
of quiet certainty. Its strength comes not
from burning impulses which move the world,
but from the boundless Love of God Himself.
How far beyond this world my Self must be,
and yet how near to me and close to God!
Father, You know my true Identity.
Reveal It now to me who am Your Son,
that I may waken to the truth in You,
and know that Heaven is restored to me.
Jesus expresses exactly how we get the results of our decisions in a variety of ways:
1) Specialness, 2) hostage to the ego, or Host to God, and 3) self-concept vs Self.
When consciousness is allied with the ego, seeing through the body’s eyes, it faces the enormous task of defending this decision. It does this by seeing itself as special.
Specialness is the great dictator of the wrong decisions. Here is the grand illusion of what you are and what your brother is. And here is what must make the body dear and worth preserving. Specialness must be defended. T-24.I.5:1-4
This is the primary motivation for attacking your brother. The worse you see him, the better you are. It is always a matter of one-up-man ship; if I can see my brother as “down,” then I can see myself as “up.” This is a classic mistake in the dream.
For what your brother must become to keep your specialness is an illusion. He who is 'worse' than you must be attacked, so that your specialness can live on his defeat. For specialness is triumph, and its victory is his defeat and shame. How can he live, with all your sins upon him? And who must be his conqueror but you? T-24.I:6-10
Just after writing this section on Specialness, I stopped writing for the day and began reading the newspaper, and much to my surprise and delight, I came across this cartoon.
The regular font “I’s attack the italicized “I” who is different.
When I showed it to my wife, Christine, who did not know what I had just been writing about, she said, “They attack him because they think he’s special.”
Thank God that all is not lost because we engage in games of Specialness. The Holy Spirit can use these special situations as a means for correction.
The specialness he chose to hurt himself did God appoint to be the means for his salvation, from the very instant that the choice was made. His special sin was made his special grace. His special hate became his special love. T-25.VI.6:6-8
When I decide to ally with the ego, I create sons as my Father created me, but my son is a child of earth, a parody of god’s creation, and I am very protective of his specialness.
How bitterly does everyone tied to this world defend the specialness he wants to be the truth! No effort is too great, no cost too much, no price too dear to save his specialness from the least slight, the tiniest attack, the whispered doubt, the hint of threat, or anything but deepest reverence. This is your son, beloved of you as you are to your Father. Yet it stands in place of your creations, who are son to you, that you might share the Fatherhood of God, not snatch it from Him. What is this son that you have made to be your strength? What is this child of earth on whom such love is lavished? What is this parody of God's creation that takes the place of yours? And where are they, now that the host of God has found another son whom he prefers to them?T-24.VII.1
2. Hostage to the ego, or host of God
This is another way that Jesus expresses that we get the results of our decisions. When I decide to engage in one-up-man ship, I am, as the mechanism of decision, held hostage to the ego in time; when I decide to forgive these thoughts, I am hosting God, and this is my salvation.
I asked you earlier, 'Would you be hostage to the ego or host to God'? Let this question be asked you by the Holy Spirit every time you make a decision. For every decision you make does answer this, and invites sorrow or joy accordingly. When God gave Himself to you in your creation, He established you as host to Him forever. He has not left you, and you have not left Him. All your attempts to deny His magnitude, and make His Son hostage to the ego, cannot make little whom God has joined with Him. Every decision you make is for Heaven or for hell, and brings you the awareness of what you decided for. T-15.III.5
3. Self-concept vs Self
Finally, Jesus expresses specialness and salvation in another way—self- concept versus Self. As we have seen, our self-concept seems to be a hard-won sense of ourselves, a personality that we molded through years of seeming victories and defeats. Our self-concept is what we are expressing each time we use the pronoun “I,” and we steadfastly defend it against other “I’s” around us, thereby preventing us from knowing the truth, our true Self.
The concept of the self stands like a shield,
a silent barricade before the truth,
and hides it from your sight. All things you see
are images, because you look on them
as through a barrier that dims your sight
and warps your vision, so that you behold
nothing with clarity. The light is kept
from everything you see. At most, you glimpse
a shadow of what lies beyond. At least,
you merely look on darkness, and perceive
the terrified imaginings that come
from guilty thoughts and concepts born of fear.
And what you see is hell, for fear is hell.
This is a result of the mechanism of decision allying with the ego, forming the self-concept. This prevents the awareness of the true alternative, uniting with the Self.
You are one Self, in perfect harmony
with all there is, and all that there will be.
You are one Self, the holy Son of God,
united with your brothers in that Self;
united with your Father in His Will.
Feel this one Self in you, and let it shine
away all your illusions and your doubts.
This is your Self, the Son of God Himself,
sinless as its Creator, with His strength
within you and His Love forever yours.
By becoming aware of your Self, your alliance with the ego is shined away.
Now, Dear Reader, I invite you to sit back, breathe in and breathe out, and decide to experience the peace of God.
I am going to end by emphasizing that we have all power in Heaven and earth as decision makers. We must not take this power lightly, or actually we should, if we take it to mean going towards the Light. We share this power with Jesus, and here He expresses His equality with us.
My mind will always be like yours, because we were created as equals. It was only my decision that gave me all power in Heaven and earth. My only gift to you is to help you make the same decision. This decision is the choice to share it, because the decision itself is the decision to share. It is made by giving, and is therefore the one choice that resembles true creation. I am your model for decision. By deciding for God I showed you that this decision can be made, and that you can make it. T-5.II.9
If you wish to read Michael Brown's New Year Letter in its entirety, please click here.