This is a commentary on “Jeremy,” an essay from the book, “Against the Pollution of the I: Selected Writings of Jacques Lusseyran.”
I
was so inspired reading this essay that I recorded passages that came to mind
as I read certain sentences and paragraphs.
Sentences and paragraphs
from the essay are in bold, and my passages are in a plain font.
I do not know if there is
a greater blessing than to encounter a true old person, that is, one who is
joyous.
Jeremy
was an example: he found joy in the midst of Block 57. He found it during moments of the day where we found only
fear. And he found it in such great abundance that when he was present we felt it rise in us. Inexplicable
sensation, incredible
even, there where we were: joy was going to fill us.
Eternity
William
Blake
He who binds to himself a joy
Does the winged life destroy;
But he who kisses the joy as it flies
Live in eternity’s sunrise.
The one who
fills my memory is like this. His name is Jeremy Regard.
It
is not I who would give him this name. It was his. How many novelists would
like to have invented it?
This is how “regard” is translated into
English:
Regardez
l’homme.
Look at the
man.
Je tiens
l’homme en grande estime.
I hold the
man in great regard.
Jeremy was looking through.
Lesson 42,
God is my strength. Vision is His gift.
And
here and there one could just barely glimpse a second forge standing there, a forge of the spirit.
I
heard Jeremy speak of men who did not come to his shop just for their horse and
their wagons but for
themselves. They came so as to go home all steeled and new, to take home a little of the life they were
lacking and which they found overflowing, shining, and gentle at the forge of father Jeremy.
.
. .he seemed to be addressing invisible
beings. through you.
Namste.
You
felt it as you feel a hand on the shoulder, a hand which summons, which brings you back
to yourself when you were about to disappear.
I am God’s
Son, complete and healed and whole, shining in the reflection of His Love. (Who am I?)
Each
time he appeared, the air became breathable: I got a breath of life smack in
the, face.
The root meaning of “spirit,” is “to breathe.” We are
breathing ion the Holy Spirit, the breath of God.
But I also knew many who died very quickly,
like flies, because they thought they were in hell.
Lesson 325, All things I think I see reflect ideas.
From
judgment comes a world condemned. And from forgiving thoughts a gentle world
comes forth…
"For
one who knows how to see, things are just as they always are," he said.
Well,
without a doubt, there exist in certain beings, as there existed in him, a rightness and wholeness so perfect
their way of seeing communicates itself,
is given to-you; for, at
least, an instant. And the silence then is truer, more exact, than any word.
But
one day it became obvious, palpable to me in the flesh, that Jeremy, the welder, had lent me his
eyes.
With
those eyes, I saw that Buchenwald was not unique, not even privileged to be one
of the places of greatest
human suffering. I also saw that our camp was not in Germany as we thought, in the heart of the
Thuringee, dominating the plain of Lena, in this precise place and in no other. Jeremy taught
me, with his eye, that Buchenwald was in each one of
us, baked and re-baked tended incessantly, nurtured in a horrible way. And that
consequently we could vanquish it, if we
desired to with enough force.
One time n Session, Dear One said, “I will stand
here for a moment so that you can catch your true reflection.”
. .
.the land of Cockaigne.
In medieval times Cockaigne was a mythical land of plenty.
A
man who did not dream: that was more important than anything. The rest of us
were dreamers.
Prospero:
Our revels now are ended. These our actors,
As I foretold you, were all spirits, and
Are melted into air, into thin air:
And like the baseless fabric of this vision,
The cloud-capp'd tow'rs, the gorgeous palaces,
The solemn temples, the great globe itself,
Yea, all which it inherit, shall dissolve,
And, like this insubstantial pageant faded,
Leave not a rack behind. We are such stuff
As dreams are made on; and our little life
Is rounded with a sleep.
Our revels now are ended. These our actors,
As I foretold you, were all spirits, and
Are melted into air, into thin air:
And like the baseless fabric of this vision,
The cloud-capp'd tow'rs, the gorgeous palaces,
The solemn temples, the great globe itself,
Yea, all which it inherit, shall dissolve,
And, like this insubstantial pageant faded,
Leave not a rack behind. We are such stuff
As dreams are made on; and our little life
Is rounded with a sleep.
The Tempest. (4.1. 18-58)
For
him, and for us through him, the world was saved in each second. This
benediction had
no end. And, when it ceased, it was that we had ceased wanting it, that we—and not it—had ceased being joyful.
Lesson 325,
All things I think I see reflect ideas.
This is
salvation’s keynote.
What
was supernatural in him, from all evidence, didn't belong to him; it was meant
to be shared. The
spectacle, if it existed, was for us to find and to find within ourselves. I have the clearest memory of finding it.
I perceived, one day like the others, a little place where I did not shiver, where I had no
shame, where the death-dealers were only phantoms, where life no longer
depended on the presence of the camp or on its absence. I owed it to Jeremy.
This reminds me of making contact with small
children. For example, I am in the
checkout lane at Wal-Mart, and a small child is in the cart in front of me makes
great eye contact with me, recognizing something in me that his parents do not
see. We just keep it up, smiling, until
his parents checkout and leave.
What
I call the supernatural in him was the break with habits which he had
completely realized.
Those habits of judgment which make us call any adversity
"unhappiness" or "evil,"
those of greed which make us hate, desire vengeance, or simply complain—a minor but incontestable form of hatred—those of our
dizzying egocentricity which make us think
that we are innocent each time we suffer. He had escaped from the network of compulsive reflexes, and it was this necessary
movement which neither good health—or even perfect health, if such
exists—can explain.
Lesson 61, I am the light of the world.
. . .the ego’s petty views of what you are and what your purpose
is.
If
I have used the word "supernatural," it is because the act of Jeremy sums up to me the religious act
itself: the discovery that God is there, in each person, to the same degree, completely in each
moment, and that a return can be made toward Him.
Who is
the light of the world except God's Son? This, then, is merely a statement of
the truth about yourself. It is the opposite of a statement of pride, of
arrogance, or of self-deception. It does not describe the self-concept you have
made. It does not refer to any of the characteristics with which you have
endowed your idols. It refers to you as you were created by God. It simply
states the truth.
We
would all gain a lot by putting memory in quarantine.
The petty memory, at least, the stingy, encumbering
memory which makes us believe in this unreality, this myth: the past.
Lesson 7, I
see only the past.
It
is memory which suddenly brings back—without a shadow of reason—a person, or
the shred of an event which then installs itself in us. The image throws itself
on the screen of
consciousness; it swells, soon there is nothing else but it. The mind's
circulation stops.
The present disperses. The moments which follow no longer have the force to carry us. They no longer have any
flavor. In short, this memory secretes melancholy, regret, all manner of inner
complication.
The miracle does nothing. All it does
is to undo. And thus it cancels out
the interference to what has been done.
It does not add, but merely takes away.
And what it takes away is long since gone,
but being kept in memory appears
to have immediate effects. This world
was over long ago. The thoughts that made
it are no longer in the mind that thought
of them and loved them for a little while.
The miracle but shows the past is gone,
and what has truly gone has no effects.
(T-28.1)
(T-28.1)
Jeremy, when he
speaks to me, does
not do so from out of my past, but from the depths of my present, there, right
in the center.
I cannot move him.
There is no link of
memory to the past. (T-28.1)
The good which he
enjoyed was not his. Or rather, it was—but
by participation. It was just as much ours. This is the mystery and power of those beings who serve something other
than their own provisional personalities: one cannot escape them.
Christ is God's Son as He created Him.
He is the Self we share, uniting us
with one another, and with God as well.
(What is the Christ?)
with one another, and with God as well.
(What is the Christ?)